Some days the monotony takes over. I can’t help but be overwhelmed by my apathy towards the life I’m creating.
Hm. let’s focus on my choice of the word “creating.” I’m creating this life. I’m not living it. I’m not an idle passenger. I’m creating it. So why can’t I create something different? Something happy. Is it wrong that I feel underwhelmed by how life is turning out. I had such high expectations and it just isn’t what I thought it would be.
All days aren’t like this. But today someone texted me the usual “How was your day?” I started to type out my response of “It’s been alright” as I scrolled up to yesterday’s same exact conversation. Has another day truly passed? What has changed since then? How have I grown since then? I haven’t. I’m still in the same position. A ball of stress forms in the pit of my stomach filled with the fear and panic that I’m stuck but I shove it back down. No time for stress. I’m 23. Be alive. Be free. Be young. Reddit. 9gag. Instagram. Snapchat. Homework. Applications. Netflix. Reddit. 9gag. Instagram. Snapchat. Homework. Applications. Netflix.